Watching the Unschooling Pieces Crumble - Part 10 of Dealings With a Guru

The blog that should not even need to happen….

I had placed my blog on the backburner so that I could release the hold that my experience had on me and allow others to move in to the forefront to reflect on their own dealings with the Martins. It did not take long before I was invited to a group on facebook that would serve as a database of collected facts and personal experiences regarding Dayna and her multiple business ventures. This clearinghouse page is a temporary tool that will be used to create a final document of facts to showcase Dayna and her dealings with the public. This group is not a free-for-all as only individuals with solid data have the ability to add factual information that is being followed-up on and researched. The truths being uncovered are immensely disturbing to me, but it is crystal clear that it is necessary, at the same time. Dayna is good at her day job. She has managed to manipulate and defraud families for a decade or more. You can view the collected data here……………..

https://www.facebook.com/groups/414499508667539/?fref=ts

It has been brought to my attention that although Rethinking Everything Conference refunds were offered a few weeks ago, that agreement has now been withdrawn and registration is now completely non refundable, even for those that were affected by the deceit. There are differing reasons why people are choosing to request refunds, but they almost all boil down to the fact that the product is not what they originally paid for. I would like to request that those of you who find yourself in this position, file a complaint with your credit card company and send them any factual information you have.

The following posts have been made by members of the Martin family the last few days………….

When Dayna was asked why she could not just be honest and stop deleting messages, Dayna responded with this statement, before going on to talk about her personal feelings in the same group….…..

“This group is about the RE conference and as I told you, if you want to discuss my personal life further, you can continue to message me like you have. This is crossing in to harassment at this point.”

From Joe Martin:

“ok this is gone on long enough. All you mean ass bullying ass woman, mothers, leave my fuckin wife and family alone. You call yourselves advocates for family. Your all evil and cold. Nothing more. (make sure you screen capture that)”

My response:

I agree that the lies have gone on long enough. I would like to put this behind me, but the manipulation of the public and the fraud that we are uncovering honestly seems never ending. I know that you may see this as some “witch hunt”, but we are actually BEING advocates for families. We are all working on this to protect these very families from the assault that Dayna has dished out for years. Evil and cold are the last thing that we are. We truly care about our children. We do not wish for them to be used as pawns in your chess game any longer.

From Dayna Martin (posted in the RE conference group):

“There are no "sides" to take with this issue. It has gone from my personal Facebook account being exploited and used to send my personal messages to others. I have been threatened with messages such as, "Ha ha! you're goin' down, Sweetheart."

I have been bullied, lied about slandered and hurt beyond anything I have ever experienced before. CPS showed up on our doorstep yesterday because of this issue. They are returning this Friday. This is my worst nightmare and it is all because of this insane blog. I would never, ever, in a billion years do the extreme things that I am being accused of. HOW can I fight this except to reach out and ask you all for help.

I've made some mistakes, but NO ONE deserves this and to view it as the writings from a sane person is mindblowing to me. It is so incredible people are standing by watching this happen.

I have anxiety attacks and nightmares from this bullying. I can't sleep. I can't eat. This is WRONG.

I have screenshots of Patti's daughter Sydney, messaging my daughter Tiffany telling her that Jen Green has gone over their house and screamed and sworn at her telling her to write negative accusations about me and this little girl is scared. It is beyond abuse and manipulation.

I am scared that I will lose my children. Please help us in any way that you can. I am reaching out to you as a community.

There is SO much to share about what really happened in Texas. I have respected everyone involved, but there comes a point when you can't take the abuse anymore and one needs to stand up for themselves. I am scared to come out there. I am afraid of the mental instability of those out there doing this to me. Calling CPS on us was just beyond slandering and bullying. HOW can anyone be so cruel as to do that to us?!!”

My responses:

·         I would love to believe there are no sides, but I think it is now too late for that. You singlehandedly placed a rift in the unschooling world when you appeared on the scene as an expert in 2006. I do wholeheartedly believe, though, that unschooling will recover and now the community will reemerge as a whole unit once this is over.

·         This message that you refer to as a threat is no such thing. That is someone sharing their disgust with you. That does not equal someone placing you or your family in physical danger. Are you saying this is the type of message you refer to as “threatening messages placing you in danger”?

·         You continue to use these words bullying and slandering. I have not seen one ounce of that in my blogs, anyone else’s blogs, or the clearinghouse group. I have not contacted you in any form, at all. I have written my own experience and responded to your claims posted in facebook and your blog. I have asked no one to come after you. I have not contacted authorities of any kind. Also, you do not seem to be doing your own research, AT ALL. Slandering involves lies. I have not lied about one thing, whether you are in the mood to admit it or not.

·         CPS showed up at your door? Many thoughts have run through my mind since I read that. My first thought was, did they really and how can this be proven? I simply do not believe you. Were you the only one home? Was Joe present? The kids? Can you help us to understand how terrifying that was and what they ended up saying when they left? Do you have documentation?

·         I can’t say I am surprised that you would blame my blog for the CPS visit and not your own actions over the years, but really? Have you seen the clearinghouse? Have you seen the documented evidence of your own wrongdoing that goes back over a decade? It was not me and there are plenty of other people who are pissed that you got away with this for so long. My blog gave others the ability to come together over common traumatic events and those events all involve you.

·         I have racked my brain to figure out why the CPS story would appear now. I am wondering if this is a way to get out of going through with RE, maybe? Are you waiting until the last minute to cancel and then run off with the money? Could it simply be a way to elicit more support for your “poor me” cause? I really don’t know. I hope it is not true because I don’t actually hate you enough to wish that on your children.

·         You say you would never do these things you are being accused of. So, why are you not telling your side of the story out in the open? You are treating everything the same you did a few months back. You do not want to speak to more than one person at a time, so you ask for people to send you private messages to spread your lies in the safe confines of your lie bubble. I agree the things I have said are pretty damn awful and I should know because I lived them. So, your side please?

·         You bash people for believing my own insane writings, but what about the dozens of people that have come forward to tell their own stories. You cannot say that I am doing this to you, dear. You are doing this to you. I thought you believed in the LOA. How is that working for you now?

·         Time to pay attention folks! She has now taken her problems that she created and has made it your responsibility to fix it. She is no longer just a simple manipulator. She is now asking for you to join a manipulator community so you will be responsible for the outcome and not her. These sentences stand out to me…..” It is so incredible people are standing by watching this happen” and “Please help us in any way that you can. I am reaching out to you as a community.” Help her if you feel so inclined, but educate yourself on what is really happening before you do.

·         I have no human words to express the motherfucking lie you are attempting to convey about the screenshots you claim to have of Sydni and Tiffany. I will allow Patti to respond to this and will only add…..where are the screen shots? Who is dragging the kids in to this exactly? Are you getting so desperate that you will now begin using photoshop to produce them? If you do, then find a way to timestamp it so it reflects when these Sydni and Tiffany conversations happened.

·         Why are you scared to come out here? Is this another way for you to get out of coming to RE? I have not threatened you once. I have not sent anyone to threaten you once. I am not a violent person and I am so uninterested in ever seeing you again that my family and I won’t even be in town while you are. I promise you, I will not harm anyone in your family, but you also have made a commitment to make this conference happen, so you probably should keep that promise. Keep your promise, even if you look like an ass doing it.

·         Did you really just call me mentally unstable? The one who attempted to get you help? You are a sorry excuse for a human being. That is just all there is to that statement.

The following is an email that Dayna wrote to respond to a question that asked why she took kids in to a bar……………………

I never brought a child into a bar. Ever. There may have been children of the parents that I was with who came to check in with their parents/caregivers at certain times, but it was a family event! There were kids and parents together everywhere. Also, they knew that I was under the influence. It was the responsibility of the parents to care for the children whom they brought. It would be irresponsible for them to leave me with any kids to care for on my time off, knowing I had been drinking. If a child followed me in there without me knowing, it surly wasn't my fault or responsibility. I don't remember that being the case though. There were beer tents and they were everywhere It wasn't my responsibility Period*I admit, I was very drunk It was hot out and everyone started drinking early Any other questions? It was irresponsible for them to put kids in my care, knowing I was drunk. I am sick of the blame being passed onto me. I am owning my mistakes. This was not one of them.

My response:

I think this topic may need to be covered again. This is Texas and it is not illegal to take kids in to a bar or a liquor store. The problem is not that you took them in to a bar. The problem is that you USED them to go to the bar.

The bar that we are referring to could hold about 50 people, so there was the actual bar area and then there were tables. The kids said, “we wanna go to the trampoline”. I said “we are walking that way and will get there in just a bit”. Dayna said, “hey, I can take them because I know that they are wanting to spend time with me and I can jump with them”. We said, “ok, cool, we will meet you there”. It took us about 45 minutes to mosey there. I expected them to be done and waiting, but they had just gotten into the line. I said, “wow, why are you just now in line?” and left it at that when I just got stares. It was after Dayna was gone that Sydni and Alannah told Patti, “hey, btw it was really weird having to sit in that bar with Dayna while she got drinks”. Then it all made sense. This is why it took so long for them to get to the trampoline and why they were barely in line. She made herself responsible by offering to take them. The kids said they even asked her to not go in the bar, but she said it was ok and had them sit at a table and watch her have 2 double vodkas. The kids just wanted to spend time with her. The time she had promised for days on end.

Patti Stephens has contacted me to let me know that they are having an extremely rough day today. The fact that Dayna has now involved Sydni (10yo) in another lie is really taking its toll on their sanity and peace. They are working to provide a response to Dayna’s claims and I will post it on my blog and in the clearinghouse when it is completed and sent to me…….

Watching the Unschooling Pieces Crumble - Part 9 of Dealings With a Guru

The Last Post

I have backups of my blog, in several places, in case anything ever happened to me and the information needed to be accessed. I only say this because I am aware of what they are capable of.

This is MY last “planned” blog entry regarding Martin anything, aside from any personal experience that others have not shared just yet or anything I may need to respond to that unexpectedly comes up.

While mulling over Dayna’s last blog, I attempted to respond and realized that I would simply be repeating myself. I have said what I need to say, so I look forward to working on a happier and healthier blog, later on down the road. I have found a sense of closure with where I am at. I am releasing positive intent toward anyone that still needs to heal from this beautiful disaster and I am available to speak to if you need that, as well. I have done what I can do to remind people that you do not need a guru in your life and that you are more powerful than you will ever know. Take care of yourself and fall in love with your families again. This is the path you are meant to be on, so embrace where you are, who you are, and respect the journey that is unfolding for you every day. YOU are what matters in your child’s life. Peace and thank you for being part of my own journey.

Jen

Watching the Unschooling Pieces Crumble - Part 8 of Dealings With a Guru

Response to Blog 3

I am not sure what version of the blog post this is, due to the numerous revisions that have occurred. I am using the latest one that I have to respond to. Below is Dayna’s blog found at…….. http://thesparklingmartins.blogspot.com/

To respect copyright laws, I have left out the bulk of their blog post. Please see the Sparkling Martins or myself for the full content.

“Hopeful
This morning I woke up feeling hopeful. I am sitting with the realization that I have had relationships in the past that end badly and I am asking myself, why. I feel people pointing and laughing right now. So much childhood shit is being stirred and triggered that it is hard to stop myself from reeling through this. I see anger and hatred from people. Holding the space for this energy to move through me is the hardest thing that I have ever done in my life. My ego is screaming that it wants to be loved so much right now, yet it is hard to keep that channel open because of shame and regret. I know the love is there, it just isn't apparent at times where I am looking elsewhere."

My responses…………..

I am confused as to why you need to ask yourself why? You are the common denominator here in every single relationship that has ended badly. You need to go no further than your own actions and plots to take something from others for your own benefit.

So many times I have seen you reference the fact that people are looking at you NOW, when they were not before, but you wanted to be this public figure. You have told me numerous times that you thrive on the attention and you even told my husband that your favorite thing to do is TV because everything is fake, just like real life. So people may be pointing, but they are pointing at both of us for different reasons and if people are laughing, it is because laughter is healing and this is pretty traumatizing for all those who followed you for so long.

If this is bringing up childhood shit, that is great. It is the only way that you could ever possibly heal fully. What anger and hatred are you seeing from people? I really wish you would share some of it, so maybe others could understand these threats you keep talking about.

Holding the space for energy to move through does nothing to further YOUR growth. You need to face what you have done to so many or you will always be running from your past, as you still claim to be doing now.

Your ego is screaming and it wants to be loved. Isn’t that all you have received from your family and the general public? I mean, your husband has simply chosen to ignore all other points of logic and has decided to support you anyway. That is love. You have what you are seeking. All you have gotten is your ego stroked on a daily basis. It is now time for you to experience what it is like to be everyone else; a regular Joe, if you will. What are you shameful for and what do you regret? I would love to see specifics because you cannot hope to heal without coming clean.

This is your opportunity to tell your side of the story. We have absolutely nothing to hide and you know this. My children are fully aware of what happened because it happened to them directly. Do not use the excuse of not wanting to hurt their parents. I am begging you to please come up with some shred of evidence-based information that I would be ashamed of you telling the world about.

You would rather people just think what they want instead of you having to be right? Are you being serious? That is your comeback? You are the better person by staying silent and taking the brunt of the anger and hatred? This is not a strength; it is a copout.

Please also share with us what fears you had that caused you to be inauthentic while in Texas? You did not seem scared at all except when you played the fear card to get your way.

So you say that you open up too quickly with people. That makes it sound like we befriended you and pushed you to trust us. You were the one that started every single thing that began way back in October 2012. You made the first move every single time. You invited yourself to my daughter birthday party. You invited us to Florida in December. You decided to come to Texas in April and then again in May. You said you wanted to have a baby with my husband so you would know what it is like to have a child that comes from love. You do not open up quickly. You throw yourself in the direct path of anything appealing. You have always gotten everything you want.

So you have a lot to work on. What do you need to work on exactly? What did you just admit? All you said was that you have stuff to let go of, but as I remember, we were left here to hold on to what you did and you gave yourself permission to totally release it because you could not handle the stress.

How do you have feelings of not belonging? You involve yourself in every aspect of every person’s life that interests you.

Perfectionism? I cannot see how you can take that word and apply to you. You do not care about being perfect. You care about being right. You care about winning.

What type of inner work have you done? What kind of help have you received to allow you to view your ego so clearly?

People don’t see you as perfect. They see what you present to them and that is an unattainable goal of superhuman proportions. They see you as this because you told them to. You are the little voice that is inside their heads, telling them they are not good enough parents. I can say this because I had that voice and I have been told by numerous people that they were all so depressed and overwhelmed attempting to be more like you, because of that voice. That is one thing, but then for them to find out that they also did not trust their intuition that alerted them to the fact that something just wasn’t right with your advice. This is very tough for many people and I am sure they would like to know who the real Dayna is.

I do not want to go in to LOA, so I will just say this….LOA works off of intention, not positive laced lies that you say out loud. You are living LOA this very minute. You created this.

Do you realize how you talk? You are always the victim and everyone else is always at fault. These are things you said………… OTHERS have felt let down by the reality of who I am, THEY see me flawed, THEY see my embarrassment. This is about you being innocent and everyone else being at fault for how you present yourself.

Damn this is painful. I really really hope it is. If this is happening to you and you are only planning your next move instead of actually working on healing, then that is a very bad sign. What are you doing to lessen this great pain that only you are experiencing?

You are not present with your kids right now? When ARE you present with them? You have Joe care for them because you are too busy to be bothered by being a parent or because you have to get paid to help other families. And if you were ever concerned about them, you would not have planned to take them from their own home and move them here without even telling them your plan.

I am very happy to hear you will be taking a break from enlightening the world with your gifts. This is wonderful news and I hope that you stick with that promise. What worries me is that you plan to bounce back from all this by the time RE comes around. How is that possible? This is a time when you should be receiving hospitalized treatment for your diagnosis. Have you even gone to get a diagnosis or are you waiting and hoping to ignore this long enough until it fades away? Your health and your family should be the priority, not a conference. What happened to your multiple attempts to express you have hit bottom? Where is bottom for you? It seemed to be there just a day ago.

Patti and I have no interest in face-to-face mediation with you at this time. This is our mediation. The blog posts and responses are as close as I chose to be to you. If you cannot give me an ounce of truth in your blogs, why would you do that in person? My prediction is that you wish for me to agree to that, so we can stop this conversation and put it off for another month. No thank you. I plan to be fully done with you by then.

I have chosen to not respond to the individuals commenting on their blog at this time. They are in the same position I was in before and they are choosing to believe you. That is fine and they all have their own path. I was happy to at least see that a few comments with small amounts of negativity made it through this time. It is a step forward, but showing all comments would do a much better job of reflecting who these hateful people are that you refer to…………….

 

Watching the Unschooling Pieces Crumble - Part 7 of Dealings With a Guru

Response to Sparkling Martins blog 2:

It is apparent to me that Dayna has no intention of actually coming clean about anything solid. The lies and cover ups will continue as long as I am pushing her and everyone else to face the truth. That is fine. I am here for the long haul if I need to be. At some point I will get to the end of manipulations I am responding to, but no end in sight for now.

So there is a commenter on my first blog that refer to themselves as I AM. I feel comfortable bringing this up because Dayna responded to this person in her last blog post. To share a bit of information, my husband and I were told by Dayna that this person came to the RE conference in 2012 and appeared at her door at 3am one night. When Dayna opened the door, I AM busted through the opening and knocked her to the ground. This person demanded that she tell him she loved him and that he threatened her life. The conversation the two had was in regards to the fact that Dayna had told her husband everything about the relationship between the two and I AM was furious. She was told to never speak again or this person would kill her, so she pretended she loved him to calm him down and he left. Dayna confided in us and said that no one else knows about this and to please not tell anyone because I AM would kill her for sure. Ok, I know that is very confusing, but I explained this lie because in Dayna’s blog post, she claims that her husband now knows about the physical relationship between her and I AM. So, which is it? Did you tell your husband about this months ago and that is why I AM got angry at the conference or did you tell him after I AM posted what they did on my blog? It no longer matters since it is all a lie anyway, but I needed to touch on that because I am interested to watch the outcome of what this person has on Dayna. Patiently watching to see what the truth is.

The new challenge you have put forth on your latest blog is interesting Dayna. I have a question. How will these people come forward? Will the messages come through your blog or will they come through Joe’s facebook account? I am certain that you have taken steps to ensure this cannot actually come to fruition, such as maybe blocking those families from seeing your blog or maybe you paid them to keep them quiet or maybe it involved a threat to keep quiet? I am writing this and saying I do not know the plan here. I would like to see what happens, though. Again, patiently waiting.

Something that is really standing out to me, are the people coming forward to tell me that they have not had an experience with Dayna, per se, but that the words that she uses in her conversations mirror that of the sociopath in their own lives. Many wrote to me to say that someone finally understands what they have gone through and they are so happy to have support. I even had someone mention yesterday that it almost seems like there is some unwritten law of language that all sociopaths share. This is a very interesting concept to me. Here is the kicker. I have my attachment to the Dayna situation because that was my experience, but Dayna is not even special anymore, it seems. She is turning out to be just a regular sociopathic personality that got away with scamming hundreds of people before she got exposed. Anyway, I am truly grateful for the experiences that people have shared with me and I am very comforted by the fact that I have helped to facilitate further healing for those that are not even connected to this particular issue.

I would like to touch on the posts from Joe’s account that involve the subject of legal matters. I will not go in to all the legal explanations again, but what I want to say to those who are offering to put money towards a legal fund for the Martins, please be careful. I do understand that you want to support what you believe in, but at least expect accountability. There should be complete transparency in what they use the money for, otherwise, this may simply become another business for them to live off of. Please watch your back, that is all I am saying.

There is much concern for the wellness of the next conference that happens in August here in Texas. The Rethinking Everything conference is very special to me and I absolutely hate seeing it destroyed the way it has been this year. I am no longer involved, as I refuse to have anything to do with a Martin run establishment, but I so hope that after this year, it can somehow bounce back to its earlier form. There is great worry among those that are still planning to attend and I fully understand why. A side effect of what I am doing here is that many innocent bystanders will be affected negatively. I am truly sorry and I do hope that the conference can bring a sense of community, at the very least. A message was posted in a facebook group that explained very well, the fears of those who are registered and this person is concerned that the conference will turn in to a he said, she said convention. I do not wish this for anyone and I wanted to share my response to that post, so that maybe you all can see it is not the conference organizer that builds the community. It is the community itself. My response……

“Please make it whatever you need it to be, for you, even if it ends up as a 6 day picnic with everyone sleeping in tents! You guys can do this! Do not have attachment to what it will look like. Just know it will be wonderful and you can build something even stronger next year. Also, be prepared for something to happen that may send even bigger shock waves through the community soon. The entire truth needs to come out so that the ENTIRE unschooling community can heal as a cohesive unit. Team Green and team Martin should not exist for much longer.”

Here is blog 2 from Dayna: http://thesparklingmartins.blogspot.com/

To respect copyright laws, I have left out the bulk of their blog post. Please see the Sparkling Martins or myself for the full content.

"Perfect Storm

Are you kidding me? I don't feel safe anymore. My personal messages and conversations with my closest friends and family have been made public. I left my Facebook account open in Texas and my personal account was violated.

I have received threatening messages. Our family is in crisis, as are our friends who we love dearly."

My responses…….

·         Am I kidding you? No, I am not. You are leading people to believe that I hacked in to your facebook account and took advantage of you, while you state clearly here that you left it open. Not only did you leave it open, but you did so in grand style by leaving it open on 8 different devices in our home, including my children’s ipads. You are always on top of deleting everything you write that could be traced back to you, so I assume this is why you do not make sure that you log out of anything.

·         Another issue is how you claim that I am the one involving children, but I didn’t even know there was anything left open in your name until you were gone and my daughter complained that she was receiving notifications constantly. At this point, I knew you were lying and I chose to not log you out on her ipad just yet. I then sat back and watched the lies unfold.

·         You were not violated. It was actually the other way around. I was violated because you continued to lie to people about me and I would have never known the real you without watching these conversations unfold. Keep in mind, if I was this hateful person you make me out to be, I could have deleted every group that you are a part of or had started, I could have unfriended every single one of your fans, and I could have just done away with your entire account all together. It could have been a swift ending to the main connection you have to people, but I did not do that. I am actually not a malicious person. I only paid attention to what involved me personally.

·         I do not believe you have received threatening messages. Why would you? I haven’t received one threatening message, which seems a bit odd if you are receiving many. I discussed this in blog 6, so no need to revisit all of this except to remind you to call the authorities if you are being threatened. If your family and friends are in crisis, I am truly sorry because it is not at all my intention. The person at fault here is you, though, and you could end this now and release your friends and family from attempting to stick up for your lies and deceit. You did this to yourself.

·         Texas was a shit storm because you were here, not because we are. You call our relationship toxic, but you had the full ability to leave it at any time. The truth is that when we finally decided enough was enough, you would not leave until we packed you and I told you that you did not have a choice. We then had to physically walk you to the car because you could not walk straight. It is interesting that you could not walk straight, yet you attempted to shove my husband down on the bed in the RV right before leaving.

·         I cannot even fathom what you are thinking when you talk about the challenging family that had too many expectations that you were not prepared for. Let me clearly remind you that this was your second trip to come help them. They did not request your services the second time, you actually requested to come and told them to gather the money quickly because there were other families wanting your services and you wanted to give this family top priority. There must be a legal term for what you did there? The bottom line here is that you knew what a challenge the family was. You were just here with them 4 weeks earlier. Your argument here has no validity.

·         So, it was bad here and you take ownership for it. What are you taking ownership for? I am still waiting for some shred of evidence that you plan on coming clean about anything at all.

·         There are no messages of hate and cruelty that are spreading regarding your infection that was so horrid you thought you may have cancer (message to Joe). You made up a story about leaving a tampon inside yourself for two weeks to treat a UTI. I am still trying to explain that one. Anyone that knows anatomy will surely understand that you do not treat a UTI from another opening in your body. You alluded to the doctors that you had just found the tampon that morning and removed it yourself, so there was no evidence. They had to take your word for it. The fact that the doctors gave you IV Advil speaks volumes. You must have seemed like a drug seeker to get that special drug because I am a nurse and have never even heard of IV Advil. Let me also remind you that you were on your death bed so much that you went and got a new tattoo while still on antibiotics.

·         If your children are reading these it is probably a good idea. The younger ones aren’t affected unless you allow that and the older ones are old enough to take what they need to from these blogs and maybe get to know their own mom. If they are being hurt it is because you are continuing to lie and present a mom that is not the real deal. Also, you were not at all concerned about your children seeing anything back in October 2012 and you were certainly not concerned with all 7+ children in our group at Scarborough Faire who got a tour of the bar and got to watch you go french kiss a stranger.

·         Why can’t we just talk? That is a really good question. We tried to talk to you at least 30 times about everything while you were here and I sure would have loved to talk after you went back home. I believe the answer to that is in the end of your fake apology letter to me that stated you hope I can heal from this and carry this burden alone because I am not able to contact you back for “obvious reasons”, i.e. Joe will find out and beat you. I do love how you say that to every person that decides to break ties with you. It is always someone else’s fault. That includes Laurie Couture, Kelly Halldorson, and Jamie La Salla, to name a few. After they and I were pretty much done trying, you then claim it is time to talk and the end of the friendship is all on us.

·         Your 12 years as a professional are a joke. You become an expert in everything you do and present yourself as someone who cares about the greater good, but what you care about is greater fame and wealth. Your charity cases are done so that you can tell everyone about how wonderful you are, which means you are still only doing it to make yourself look better. If you really wanted to help people you would just do it and not advertise yourself as this person who offers things for free.

·         We have covered what slander really is and that is actually what you have done to everyone else. It is not what I am doing here. By saying that I knew too much almost sounds like you are hinting at the truth, but no dice. It is still completely my fault that you manipulate and lie to everyone.

·         Humanity has nothing to do with what is happening. This is all you and as I have said before, you can end this at any time.

Blog comment.....

Darlene said...

"I am Daynas mom and have kept quiet UNTIL now! I have a few things to say and really must say them. I am shocked beyond belief to think that Jen went through my daughters facebook messages and has now sent them to others. That is such an invasion of privacy it is unreal. What kind of honorable, kind person would do such a despicable thing.In my world if someone did that their credibility would be out the door.. Gone! Do you have any idea Jen how I feel knowing my private messages to my baby girl have been read by you and whoever else you chose to let read them? It hurts my heart so much! These are my private thoughts to my daughter- I feel I have been raped and there is nothing I can do about it is there? You will justify this I am sure.
Dayna has admitted she has made mistakes- she has apologized- she is willing to talk it through but you continue on with the hate campaign and I do not understand it at all . Who does this?? What do you want her to do so you will stop?
Dayna is now getting hate mail and I am afraid - for her and for the children. These are my 4 little grand babys that I adore. They do not deserve to hear and read all of this about their mommy. If you were really a good kind person you would have handled this in a different manner, Hate just breeds hate so --
You want to see Dayna hurt and damaged- mission accomplished. You have done what you set out to do Jen! We are all hurting by this as a family. Why?? Not only are you attacking my daughter you are hurting everyone involved and you justify it by saying people have to know the truth! Whose truth?? We all see others differently and we all look up to who we want to?? No one should ever have to bare this kind of pain you are trying so hard to inflict here. It is wrong!! Plain and simple"

July 16, 2013 at 10:00 AM

To Darlene – I do not care one bit about anything in those conversations that were not relevant to me personally. I believe the invasion of privacy is null and void at this point. Facebook was left open and I saw what I needed to know to regain my own sanity. I think what you are really concerned about is that someone knows the truth about the stuff you discussed. I don’t care about normal daily chit chat, only what you said about me and there was quite enough said. I believe the word evil was used to describe me after you saw a picture of mine back in early May. Can you tell someone is evil by a picture? Was it my dreadlocks that scared you? It is interesting how you claim I have no credibility, yet you believe what your daughter says, while I sit here with actual evidence to back up my claims. Did you seriously say that you feel like I raped you? In literal sense, I believe that is what Dayna did to my husband, but figuratively, I think it is what Dayna has done to every single person she has ever received money from. What Dayna has done is not an apology. She has simply typed words to make it sound like she was admitting to something. What is she apologizing for exactly? She is sorry she got caught. There is nothing more to it. Whose truth do people need to know? That would be the actual truth, please. I get there are versions of this and that people see things through different filters, but there is no mistaking that Dayna is indeed a fraud. This is the truth I am interested in. I agree that no one should have to bare this pain. That is why I am here; to stop her from eliciting this much pain in so many families.

There continues to be a reoccurring theme here where many of those who comment are deciding to stay blind to the actual information that I have presented. This is fine, but I cannot even respond to someone who does not read both sides of this. I feel no need to respond to anyone other than your mom this time. I did notice that you let a negative comment slip through, so that is good news. The problem with that comment is that you let it through because they were talking to your mom and not you. Throwing your mom under the bus is ok, but nothing bad about you was let through until your later blogs and even those were only partly negative. Ok, so this is all of my response to your second blog. I am sorry it is taking so long to get back to you. Hopefully I can respond to other blogs more quickly.

Watching the Unschooling Pieces Crumble - Part 6 of Dealings With a Guru

Wrapping up some more loose ends…..

Yesterday was a crazy day. I put out blog 4, thinking I was adding some unnecessary information in there, but so many thought it cinched up some gaps. Blog 5 was originally a part of blog 4 that had to be separated because of length. Blog 5 brought with it some interesting feelings. I was overwhelmed with the posting of the sex convo, as I did not know it’s relevance for sure, but felt I still needed to reflect some more of the fuckupedness that we dealt with. I know, how could I need more evidence? Anyway, as many of you know, I deleted the paste of that message because I appreciated the announcement of refunds for anyone that felt like they needed to cancel their RE registration. Here is the statement from the Martin’s…….

“Due to the recent situation with someone slandering me, I wanted to reach out and let any of you know that if you have decided to not attend due to what you read, please let me know and we will refund 100% of your registration. Dayna”

I was absolutely relieved to see that some of what I felt needed to be taken care of, was in fact, put out there as an offer. There were 2 people that received their money back pretty quickly and it was verified that it came from the RE account. Ok, some truth in business practices have been restored. Until this morning, that is. An individual asked a question this morning, on the RE page and the deleting began again. The question was about the refunding of money. There was also an email sent to the Martin’s, in regards to seeking a refund for the conference. Once the comment was deleted, this person was deleted and blocked from the group entirely and a message was returned to her, about the refund that stated it would be 45 days AFTER the conference was over, before she would receive the money. And then a second individual received the same message. Why is this still happening? In addition, there are registrants that have messaged me about the fact that the Martin’s are still deleting their posts, you are making them mad, proving my point, and effectively causing people to not attend, that just had simple questions or concerns.

The word on the street is that maybe they have run out of money. Ok, so without having to go in to the detail of the 40K she told us that she had already made from RE, let’s say that they are short on money. You would then say, wow, we did not realize that so many people would want refunds and we just have no more money to offer at this time. It will be after RE before we can get you the money. That would be a respectful explanation of what was going on. But instead, there is the continued blocking, deleting, and lying, when they just said that they would refund the money 12 hours before. My question is this…..why on earth is anyone going to believe this? You have done nothing to show you are a trustworthy company and once the conference is over, I believe you will be finding yourself in the negative or you will be somehow secretly pocketing the profit while saying you have none. Track records do not lie. Here is the message sent to those that have been chosen to not receive the refunds right away………

"We are happy to issue you a refund. You will receive the refund for registration within 45 days after the Rethinking Everything event. If you have any questions, please let us know."

Next issue with the refund message. The Martin’s just claimed that I am slandering them, which again, would mean that I am lying and none of these messages are real. So what you did was just blame me for your loss of profit, instead of yourselves. There is no telling what will be done with that information, but I will take a personal guess that it will be used for your gain with profit and loss paperwork. Always lookin to get the benefit.

Money is so very strange with all of these occurrences. Dayna cannot use her credit card at the grocery store because Joe will get mad, but then she insisted on purchasing a $260 dress for my daughter, which empties her account at home, and then she lies to Joe and tells him that my daughter just borrowed the money, AND then she is wanting to use a conference credit card to run away with us and go buy land.

I would again like to share with you the offer from Kathryn Baptista…….

If you are not refunded by the RE conference when you request one, Kathryn Baptista has offered to give a scholarship to anyone who would like to attend another conference in its place. The link to that conference is here................

http://www.northeastunschoolingconference.com/

The Sparkling Martin Blog:

I do not understand why this occurred, but the Sparkling Martin blog is now password protected and invitation only. What is accomplished by doing this? The blog cannot be seen now to allow for them to tell their story and I cannot reply to anything that was brought up because I cannot see it. No one, unless invited, can get their side of things to even see which one of us is more credible. I would love for someone to explain what they have to gain from this? Are they in there plotting some revenge against me? Is she describing in detail all of the pain I am putting her through so others will feel more sorry for her? So, when someone inquired, Joe said that the “blog is taking a nap”.

Joe’s comment on a blog:

This message was posted on a blog yesterday. I don’t know what Joe is thinking, but I was under the impression that they were trying to give the world a view of their innocence in all of this. They are pretending to not say nasty things, while going and doing it in secret anyway. Here is the message from Joe………

“I can not even Begin to tell you how much it saddens me to see your comment. Dayna was treated like shit by these people in real life and now online. They wanted Dayna to move in with them and be a 2nd wife. the GREENS are crazy people. Dayna said no sorry and baam fatal attraction all day long. SOrry to post this here but i can not find any other way to contact you.”

Soooooooo, what? It is getting WAY clearer at this point. We knew that something was being said to convince him that we were wrong and she was right. But what could it be? Well, this does explain it in very clear terms. Apparently, Dayna was able to assemble a story that would get her off the hook for every single thing that happened in Texas. My educated guess of how this played out is………..

1.      We treated her like shit while she was here, by providing her with every need she had, but she tells Joe that she was held hostage here and she had nowhere to escape to.

2.      I am treating her like shit, online, by telling the truth after she lied about me to everyone she spoke to, but she tells Joe that all 15 of us are making everything up, even Patti that had her money refunded, due to Dayna being unable to complete her mission.

3.      We wanted Dayna to move in with us by telling her that she would have a safe place to come to IF she had to leave her abusive husband, she told us that she was going to lie to her children and say they were going on vacation, so that she could get away safely with her kids, but she tells Joe that we demanded that she move here immediately be our 2^nd wife.

4.      Dayna begged us to let her find escape with us, while attempting to offer to support us with all of her endeavors and we would never have to work again because she will be getting 50K an episode for her UK unnanny show, but she tells Joe that she said no way and then we kicked her out for not obeying. Which is it, was she sick with something or was she our slave that week? Pick one.

5.      Who is boiling rabbits and had to be removed to get her away from children? And why didn’t you contact my friend on facebook, Joe? You guys were still friends the day that you sent this message. And why would you put this on a blog that is about Life Rocks? Do you know people get emails when a post is made?

Sociopathic behavior – what can I get from someone that I want and what can I make them take from me that I want them to have? Every transaction with Dayna is supported by that statement.

I have read in Dayna’s blog that she is receiving threatening messages and she is concerned for the safety of her and her family. If you are receiving threats, then please contact the police. No one has the right to threaten your life and the authorities should know about those or you should post them out in the open for people to see. Call them out on it! My guess is that you are not receiving these messages because I have been told by you that you love the drama and all attention is good attention, even the haters just help you right along in your quest to become stronger. Any time there is an event in your life, I believe you make up the fact that you have these aggressive haters, so you can look more important. It happened after wife swap when you asked your fans to go post on your behalf, it happened on Amazon when you asked your fans to give you sparkling reviews on your book, it happened after you were on a radio show, it happened when you were invited to speak at conferences, and it happened when you and a certain unschooling friend had words recently. I think you may have a problem with self importance. This is the message she sent me when talking about her unschooling friend that she was angry at….

Dayna Martin

I think she was influenced by one of my haters...
I have a few now and LOVE it ;)

 

Ok, so suicide threats……………..

Suicide is a very real problem and although I believe that it is the decision of the individual, I also think that we should do anything in our power to help someone that is contemplating suicide. Let me be very clear, the first suicide comment that was brought to my attention occurred on Tuesday, May 28^th, after Dayna had been gone from our home for 24 hours. The phone call I received was someone that was very concerned about her and wanted some answers. When we found this out, the person referred to as the transporter and Patti, both returned to Patti’s home to check on Dayna and intervene if necessary. The next time that I was introduced to her threatening suicide was in a conversation that occurred between Dayna and her husband. The basic overview is that she said I will just kill myself and he said no you won’t, they talked about how he was sick of her always getting what she wants and a few minutes later, suicide was threatened again and Joe blew it off. What this did was give me the impression that he was used to hearing these threats and that he did not believe her or he would have said something else or taken action by calling someone to help her at the safe house. This is a call for attention with her. She loves herself too much to do anything harmful to her own body.

So, just to be safe, you all know that I messaged her friend Josha, because she is a therapist. You know how well that went over. You also know about the message on Josha’s wall, insinuating that I did nothing for Dayna to help her. I have since spoken to another of Dayna’s friends, who is a counselor, and sent a message to Dayna to offer her services of help if they are needed at this time. The email was ignored. Josha then posted on her wall about how being bullied can lead to suicide, insinuating that she is concerned about Dayna and that I will be the cause of her suicide since I have been called a bully numerous times by those close to her. The same friend that messaged Dayna directly, also commented on Josha’s post about how to get Dayna help if she is in this much trouble. Josha said some flighty crap about us all living in our pain bodies and everyone is wrapped up in stuff that isn’t real. Huh? Didn’t you just post about bullying and suicide and then ignore that any of it matters because we are just in our “pain body”? I am officially done talking about the concern of Dayna and suicide. I think I and many others have asked enough times for her to get help. This was the response from Josha and it is now in their court……..

“I know you are trying to be helpful in a way that feels good to you. I know that when people are not their best self they can do and say some pretty crazy things. I know that many people are acting from their pain body's right now and well that's just what we do until we don't. All that I can hope is that everyone hunker down and do their own work. This whole "event" has allowed me to dig in deeper to past pain and suffering I endured as a child. If you want to continue to cut and past and post private conversations on facebook, that is absolutely your choice, if you want to have a conversation I am happy to have that. I do know that when people are not centered and they are reactive they can say and do some pretty awful things. I do know public shaming is not good for anyone. Inflaming the whole victim perpetrator dance is not something I want to participate in. I personally am grateful for my journey through this. There is so much attack and defense happening and from my perspective it's all the "stuff" that we are not that is bubbling up to the surface, now all we can do is move through it.”

Enough for now. I still have not gotten a chance to respond to her blog 2 and 3, so those will hopefully be on the next blogs. It all depends on what needs to be responded to the most. I am taking a much needed break tomorrow, so I will check back in over the weekend. Peace.

Jen

 

 

Watching the Unschooling Pieces Crumble - Part 5 of Dealings With a Guru

Regarding blog post from Dayna:

Blog 1: Processing

I am tired of hearing how you are going to take responsibility. What exactly are you taking responsibility for because it looks to me like you are using pretty words to still say nothing at all. You say you work through things privately, but that is only because you have to cover up your lies. You were not private at all around us and you never have been. You have always freely shared the feelings you have for others and the terrible struggles you have endured. You were never private, unless you count telling everyone multiple stories a privacy thing. Let’s say, for your sake, this better be your worst drunken moment. I can’t imagine anything worse. Thanks for taking the high road and not hurting me by responding? What? That makes no sense. What could you hurt me with? I am an open book and you are well aware of that. I am pretty sure that you are right about Joe being upset that you said he was beating you. I suppose you can call them accusations, but you kinda told us it was the case, every single time we spent time with you. The accusations of him beating you, came from your mouth, so if he is upset, then he is upset with you and your lies. You did not choose to decide together that you would be expanding your relationships to open. You told him that is what you wanted after you left here the first time. One more characteristic you chose to take from someone else, and then you got upset when he looked at a woman that was not you. It was never to elicit freedom in your relationship, it was to get what you wanted and that was my husband. I am still confused which one you were in love with, because I have heard all kinds of stories. So you MAY be a binge drinker? Well, coming from someone who claims to never drink, how interesting. How can you already be talking about the awesome growth you will experience? You are taking the events of what happened and saying that, oh, it has forced me to finally be honest about the fact that I am a perfectionist. Again, what? This is a set back? A setback for your fake life that was propelling forward until I came along and messed it up by being real. This is not a setback. This just IS. And you will be dealing with it.

Here is her post that I just referred too………………http://thesparklingmartins.blogspot.com/

To respect copyright laws, I have left out the bulk of their blog post. Please see the Sparkling Martins or myself for the full content.

"Processing...

I read it and I am numb. I know people are going to jump on the bandwagon and run with it. Here is my truth... it was an awful, mess of a time. I have been trying to run from it, but I have a responsibility to people who have followed and respected me. I am not ignoring it, or defending myself. I am just working on keeping my head above water right now."

Darlene said...

'Ahh "sigh" here I sit at the computer again.I have so many better things to do with my time than this!But I feel the need once again to state my point!
I ask again " Who does this?" Who would spend their time hurting another human being? I said it all in my last post so will not bore you with all that rambling again.
I noticed on J G blog that she made the comment about Dayna only having positive comments on her blog. Well yeah it is her blog. I always delete the negative off my page. Who wants to leave crap on our page and fight? Daynas blog is not here for debate and argument for heaven sake. It is to share about her family! So then I notice that JG says everyone is invited to share their thoughts here on my blog. Yeah really?? I noticed that the few that had the balls to write to her in defense of Dayna were slammed badly. JG HAS the never to tell them to F off!! On her page that she welcomed them to comment on. What is with that?? Do you really think everyone that disagrees with you deserves to be bullied in this way?
Soo I guess it goes this way- Dayna should leave her blog open for them to be able to abuse her even more and then a verbal battle can go back and forth? I think I see- my mind does not work in that delusional way so it is not really clear to me.
If I were new to unscholling- a young mom with children I would run as fast as I could to put my kids in a strict catholic school after seeing this level of abuse! I truly would. To see people attacking someone that they say needs help?? Really??
I have met some lovely women in the unschooling community over the years. Some Dayna does not see any more for whatever reason but I am totally sure that they have more class than this! Much more This has made me really wonder about the humans as a race.
I could not be more proud of my daughter than I am right now. She has handled this with all the dignity she can muster up. She is holding her head up as best she can right now and doing the best she can. I am proud of you Dayna. You are the very best daughter any mom could ever ask for and I am so proud to call you my baby girl!"

July 17, 2013 at 8:33 AM

My responses to their blog comments:

Eco, I agree with everything you said. If I or others were allowed to post on her actual blog, then you would have gotten that response from me.

Jennifer, agree with you too, except her lows have not occurred yet, but maybe she can climb back up once she stops lying.

Danielle, I agree with a lot of what you said here, but this is not a bump in her road. This is a brick wall that cannot be passed until her truth comes out.

Maggie, you need new material. You simply copied what you said to 3 different places, without any thought to it. Read the actual blog and then talk to me. It makes you look stupid to state your case when you don’t even know what the case is about.

Arkansas, you just said that you haven’t read the blog and that you would sit and have drinks with her. I think you may have said that before she actually updated her blog to say she may be a binge drinker, but I don’t know? It has been revised several times, just like the accounts of her own history.

Carrie, what is with the theme of not reading before you post? Really. Don’t. Get. It.

Tracy, OMG! READ IT!

Krista, no shit? READ IT!

Leslie, fully agree and I would have added that if I could have.

Anon, why would I have a log in my eye? Did you just say tittle tattle, like we are 5 years old? This is very real. You are commenting on an unschooling blog and sounding like a shamming parent. What Dayna did is not ok. I don’t care if it is unimportant to you. Just don’t get involved then.

Jolene, I love your supportive comments!

Jan, great supportive statement.

Darlene, you have been waiting for this, so here it is. I am sorry that I am just now getting to it. There is a lot to keep up with on my end. You and the rest of the family love Dayna enough to support her lies, but not enough to actually do anything the help her get better, it seems. You are wasting your time, reading and responding to posts, but you are not physically taking her and getting her help. Why is this? I feel that, under the circumstances, I have alerted enough of you since this all happened, that a move toward healing could have at least started to take place.  

So, ahh, sigh, you have better things to do with your time, than to deal with this mess, I get it. It seems that this is the attitude that Dayna has been telling me about for the past few months. You seem too preoccupied to actually care for your daughter, but you then can spout how much you love her when people are watching. Thank you for showing me where she gets it. Who does this? Apparently me, because in all its unethical looking light, I am still attempting to get help for her and for those that she harmed and continue to harm. You are under the impression that your daughter is hurting, but what about the upwards of 50 families that have come forward to say that she has done that to them? There is a pattern. You are ignoring it. I am here to make you aware, since no one that can do anything about it is doing anything about it.

Yes, I allow positive and negative comments on my blog. I am sorry that is such a shocker and now, thank you for letting me know, that is where she gets that trait too. I am about the truth, even if it is ugly. The truth does not scare me, but I respect those who are scared about it, until I find out that they are creating a sickness with it. This is not about how you will look or your baby girl or the fact that you can’t be bothered by all of this. This is about a grown woman who you can assist with getting help because it is required for the safety of her and others. You are correct, yes, I have invited anyone to post on my blog and yes, when people post I either say thank you, I add additional information, I tell them I appreciate their thoughts, or I tell them that I do not agree and I explain why. I am not sure how you got the idea that the comments section is not for debate. That is what it is used for quite often in most of the world, just not in yours. I did not say fuck off, I said fuck you and right now I am trying to figure out why it is ok for your daughter to say the fuck when she wants, but that courtesy is not extended to others. Sounds like a whole lot of double standards that go on in your family, from what I have heard, anyway.

That is cute that you use the word delusional in a sentence like that. I believe that being honest is not delusional, whereas you see the truth as fantasy land. Wow, you call your own daughter out for relationships that ended in an ugly way in the past and you have the nerve to tell me that I am the one at fault here. I will say that all of these people have a common denominator and that is your baby girl. Are you delusional? What do you and Dayna expect? She cannot spout that she loves the attention and she loves to have haters and then get upset that she got exactly what she wanted. Are you delusional? You use the same point that Dayna did about the human race. Yes, this is the human race that your daughter has lied to, manipulated, cheated, and stole from. This is the human race where your daughter has led children to believe she is better than their own parents. This is the human race where your daughter has decided to con the entire unschooling movement. Your last sentence is really nice and I am so happy that you ended it there. Let me end my response by reminding you that just like when you committed your daughter to rehab in her teen years for playing rock music, you can do something now, as well. Love her enough to get her help. She is very sick and is a danger to others.

I will do responses to Dayna’s blog number 2 in my next blog.

ATTENTION: I have removed the last part of this post as a good faith measure. Thank you for offering refunds! I very much appreciate it. It was the right thing to do. I am not bartering with you or making any kind of deal with you, but wanted to send a note to let you know you have brightened my day just a little by being an honest business person regarding this particular exchange. You have released many people from being hostages. Jen

 

In addition, if you are not refunded by the RE conference when you request one, Kathryn Baptista has offered to give a scholarship to anyone who would like to attend a conference besides Rethinking Everything. The link to that conference is here................

http://www.northeastunschoolingconference.com/